For weeks, I was ready to give up on my half marathon training. Every time I stepped on the treadmill I dreaded the next 45 minutes of my life. And then something beautiful happened. The sun began to shine and the weather got just a little warmer. So I started running outside. And I love it. It has made all the difference in the world. In fact, I even ran my last long run (7 miles) without listening to music.

I’ve been learning a lot since taking on this new adventure. Here are just a few:

1. Accepting that I am a runner.

I’ve always wanted to be a runner. That girl who can run 6 miles; who has to buy new running shoes, not because she wants to, but because her other ones are worn out from overuse. But, you can want something and never do it. For many years I liked the idea of running, but not the act itself. It is hard, sometimes boring, and always tiring. Now that I’m actually running, I keep thinking “I wish I was a runner.” Every time I run, I think how much easier this would be if I was a true runner. Not some pseudo-runner. Then, after my long run this last weekend, I realized: I am a runner. It was the longest run I’ve ever done. There were plenty of hills, and enough cold melted-ice puddles to wet my shoes through, but I completed it. Without stopping. And I felt awesome by the end. Then some lightbulb went off: What pseudo-runner runs 15+ miles a week? Only real runners do that. I am a runner.

I’ve gone from this:

To this:

2. Using my time effectively.

I’ve been training without music for the last three weeks. In my little world, that’s pretty huge. Four months ago, I couldn’t run a mile without tunes, but now it’s just me, the road and God. I use my time away to really get before God. I sing praises, have prayer time, and just mediate on Him. It’s awesome. I love feeling like I’m training my body and my spirit at the same time.

3.  Learning the difference between big and small rocks.

For a while, whether I was running 2 miles or 7 miles, I felt really, really, really nervous right beforehand. I keep thinking “I have to run 2 miles”; “I have to run 7 miles”. It seemed overwhelming and intimidating, making me feel defeated before I ever started. Jonathan started encouraging me to think of it as “I only have to run 2 miles”; “I only have to run 7 miles”, which when compared to 13 miles is nothing (or who knows, maybe 26 miles one day). Since I’ve started seeing my small rocks, the runs don’t seem that bad. Don’t get me wrong, after running for an hour, I’m glad to be done, but at least when I start off I’m not feeling defeated.

4. I may run alone, but I am not training alone.

Training for a half marathon requires a lot of time. Being a wife and mother requires even more time. My family is sacrificing just as much as I am in this whole process. It’s not easy to ask them to give up time through the week and then 1-2 hours every Saturday for me to run. But, they do. And since starting my long runs, it seems like their support has tripled. It’s amazing. And the best part? The support doesn’t stop with just my family. Last week, Shirley bought me a new running jacket for my birthday. I love it. It has pockets in all the right places, is lightweight but still keeps me warm. (Thanks again, Shirley!) I know that come the day of my race, I’ll be able to say “I couldn’t have done it without them.”.

photo credit 1

photo credit 2