A Wife Loved Like The Church

It seems like from the moment you announce you’re pregnant, people start telling you the importance of socializing your kids. Personally, I don’t really like that term “socializing” because it reminds me of dog training. But, whatevs. You get flyers for Mommy and Me, Music Time, Reading Time, Play Gym Time, Get Your Toddler Outside So They Don’t Destroy The House Time. A mama’s days {and nights} can get completely consumed with kid time. But you know what? Mamas need friends too.

I have been extremely blessed that in both Iowa and Texas, I have lived in close proximity to women {mamas} that I really love. There are five sweet, sweet women all on my street who have become very dear to me. We try getting all the kids together {there are 13 between us all!} as often as schedules allow, but mama time PLUS kids isn’t really mama time. So what’s a mama to do to maintain her friendships?

1. Girls’ Night Out – GNOs are essential to my sanity. About once a month to every 6 weeks, the mamas on our block have a GNO. We usually schedule it for a weeknight {so as to not take away too much weekend family time}, and later in the evening {so as to either put kids to bed, or leave our hubbies with just bedtime duties}. Then it’s a night out on the town. Well, not really. We usually go to a favorite cafe or eatery for a late dinner and wine. I gotta be honest, it takes effort. Getting the kids settled, getting the hubby prepped for solo duty, getting all those women to the same place on time. Yeah, not easy. But it is always worth it. Always.

2. Buddy Up – Have a common interest? Ask your mama friend to buddy up with you. My friend, Adriane, is my workout/running buddy. Three to four times a week we either hit the road running, or the gym to lift weights. It gives us a good 30-60 minutes of one on one, no kids around, chatting. It’s great. Granted, a lot of it is winded talk {it’s surprisingly hard to keep a conversation going after 5 miles}, but we have had some really deep, really good conversations buddying up together.

3. Be Bold – I’m not a very quiet person. I’m loud and fairly opinionated. But, this might shock you, I am oddly shy. If I meet a mama at the park that I really like, I have a hard time asking for her number. Perhaps it’s the fear of rejection {though that’s never actually happened} or that it feels like some weird bar pick up “Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but here’s my number, so call me maybe.” But, I’ve met some really great ladies through just being bold enough to say “let’s do this whole park with the kids thing again!”.

4. Incorporate Others – Along with the buddy up system, if you and your kids are heading to the park {or pool, or zoo, or wherever}, invite other mamas. It might not be quite the same having all the kids around, but it still helps build friendships and foster relationships.

What are ways that you maintain friendships {as a mom, as a full time worker, students, etc}? I’d love to hear any tips or tricks you’ve learned!

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