A Wife Loved Like The Church

Au revoir, or, Good-bye Paris

Posted on: July 15, 2010

In my heart of hearts, God had been asking me for months to be okay with “letting go” of our anniversary trip to Paris. Through all the planning and saving, I safe guarded my heart from putting my hope in a Parisian trip. Know what? We aren’t going. Instead we started planning for a different trip; Ireland. Guess what? We aren’t going there either. So we planned to go to Toronto. Guess what? {Oh you guessed it!} We aren’t going.

Slowly all of our plans fell apart. One night, while nearly in tears, I told Jonathan, “I don’t really care where we go, so long as it’s just you and me.” As each new plan failed I was losing hope of ever getting time away with Jon. Then Tuesday night, something “major” happened. Julia knocked off my wedding bouquet from on top of my dresser. The delicate flowers I had painstakingly preserved for nearly 5 years were shattered. Thankfully {for her} I was 1) in total shock that is happened, 2) Jonathan was coming home in minutes. As he walked in the door I literally ran out it.

As I was running through our neighborhood I wondered, “Why do I care so much about those roses? I’m not a sentimental person in that way. What’s so upsetting about those roses?”. And it hit me. My wedding bouquet is a reminder of that life. The life before kids. The life of just Sarah and Jon. The life where we could afford to visit Paris. Where our only daily concerns were what to eat for dinner. Where it was just us. The life that seems better.

By the time I got home, I wasn’t ready to go back inside, so decided to mow the lawn. As I reached the backyard, Julia came running outside yelling “Mama!” She was thrilled beyond words to see me {even though I’d been gone less than 30 minutes}. She jumped up and down and waved to me simply beaming.

And it hit me. This life is better. Not the before-kids life. Not the jet setting life. This messy, poop-filled, lack of sleep life is better. Jon and I would not be who we are without the Windhamettes. Our relationship would not be what it is without them. Those roses were gone the moment I found out I was pregnant. They were replaced with less glamourous cloth diapers and sippy cups. And while I deeply cherish my time with Jon, I think it’s only been made sweeter and more precious because of the Windhamettes.

So now, as we have finally settled on a weekend trip and have loving people caring for our girls {Thanks Abdos!!} we are thrilled to be getting time away, time alone. Not because we want what we had, but to make what we have even better.

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17 Responses to "Au revoir, or, Good-bye Paris"

Well said, my friend!! I so appreciate your honesty about life and it’s struggles! Keep it coming!

Amen to that. Beauty wrapped up in a sleep deprived mama’s eyes. So true. And happy anniversary to you!

[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Ashleigh Baker, Sarah Windham. Sarah Windham said: An honest post about being married with kids: http://bit.ly/do56p2 […]

Praise God for your reflections and sanctification!

Wow!!!! I really needed to read this. I’m having the same difficulty right now in my own life. thank for the encouragement;)

Glad to hear it was an encouragement!

really good sarah! so true! And it’s so good to get away- so healthy for everyone! I think once your away you realize that you really needed it, and the girls probably need that time away too! It makes us better parents when we get some time alone! have a blast!

Sarah, this is really sweet. Thanks for this reminder. I think that so far one of the things I miss the most is traveling to far-off places–now we don’t have the money. One day….

BTW, I totally did not take your comment about WP the wrong way. 🙂 The picture of you on your blog is so warm and welcoming that I am inclined to always think the best of you! 😀

Alicia
P.S. Why does your twitter handle say “sadie”…but your name is Sarah? Which do you go by?

Alicia, glad you didn’t take it the wrong way! And you gave me the benefit of the doubt. 🙂

I go by Sarah, but Sadie is a name Jon calls me. Long story short, we are big Beatles fans and all Jon’s girls have their own Beatles song {Sexy Sadie, Julia, and Michelle}.

P.S. again: I am sorry you’ve had trouble commenting on my blog and I hope that goes away! In the meantime, I am starting to look into a WP move…

I’m sorry to hear about your trip changes, but encourage by your honesty regarding the challenges and richness children bring to marriage. Thanks for sharing and here’s to a blessed weekend away wherever you and Jon end up!

I’m pretty sure we’d be friends if we lived in the same place 🙂 Everything you said came from inside my head! My husband gave me the wonderful present of a trip away for Christmas just the two of us. He planned it with my mom and really wanted it to be spectacular like a cruise. Well, the plans just kept getting more and more complicated and I mostly wanted to make sure we got that trip together! We finally have something much less elaborate planned for Sept and I am THRILLED!

Also, we are definitely not those people that can’t remember life before our son. I remember it quite well, actually! Sometimes I do miss it, but I really liked how you put that all in perspective. It is SO hard sometimes to really enjoy the wonderful “new” life of parenthood… Thankfully your girls are super cute–that must make it easier!

I bet we would be friends! I always have a twinge of guilt when people say they can’t remember life before kids because it’s soooo amazing and I think “Um, I can remember!” Nice to know I’m not the only one. 🙂

Oh! Your wedding bouquet! Didn’t I make that? Well, I can make you another one anytime you want. Of course, shipping it from Texas might be a little hard…

[…] Dinner at a French restaurant – I figure, if we can’t go to Paris, Paris can come to us. Or at least the food […]

[…] and in Texas means redoing part of my undergrad}. Then there was a cross country move, financial choices for not taking a trip overseas and realizing why on earth would I want to start my own business {I am so not a business type […]

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