A Wife Loved Like The Church

Unintentional Co-Sleeping

Posted on: January 19, 2011

Nap time in the Big Bed

When Julia was born, I was firmly against sleeping in the same bed with her. I viewed our master bed as a sanctuary, a safe haven from the day. And as such, I didn’t want to share it with anyone but Jonathan. Which in reality meant, I spent a lot of nights sleeping in a rocking chair. But despite the hours spent sleeping nearly upright, I never gave in.

And then we had Hannah.

I was way too tired to make the trip 20 feet to Hannah’s bassinet and back every few hours. Before I knew it, Hannah was 6 months old and co-sleeping. Honestly, Jonathan and I didn’t mind, both knowing it gave us a little more sleep. However, somehow {maybe intuition?} Julia caught on to our new sleeping arrangements and demanded to have a spot too. Well, demanded might be a tad strong, maybe begging at 3 am is more like it. And really, who were we to fight it? {Ah, the life of sleep deprived parents}. Slowly, we weaned both girls out of our beds {well, Julia never fully – she still managed to find her way back in every few nights}.

Once we moved to Texas, we had the horror {and I do mean horror} of discovering that our movers broke Hannah’s crib. So, much before she {or we} were ready, Hannah was bumped up to a big girl bed – a twin mattress on the floor. Before we knew it, Hannah was coming into our room every.single.night. We pushed both girls’ beds together, in hopes that it would deter Hannah from leaving. But it did not. And, if Hannah left, Julia was sure to follow.

So our sleeping arrangements are back to unintentional co-sleeping. And while we don’t love fighting over the space at 1 am, I’ve learned to deal with enjoy having baby feet in my face every night. After all, this won’t last forever. Right?

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14 Responses to "Unintentional Co-Sleeping"

Aww, I know nothing about this since I’m not a parent, but I can imagine it would be really hard to break habits like this. That picture of them napping is so adorable!

that is precious. One thing I tell engaged couples is get a King size bed. Even if you don’t plan on co-sleeping with your kids later- those little stinkers find their way into your bed at some point or another. 🙂 For us it is only on Saturday mornings- but with 3 kids now someone is falling off our Queen bed!

We are semi- cosleeping with Hudson. I have a pack and play that he sleeps in right next to the bed, so he usually goes down in that, but if he’s hard to settle, he ends up in bed with us. I am a fan of anything that helps us all get more sleep so I don’t really mind and Mike likes it because he can tell how much Hudson likes it. Plus, H is now getting the hang of nursing in the side lying position which is great because I can half sleep while hs’e nursing at night. I do kind of wonder how this will go once he gets older or we add another kid to the mix, but for now it’s working and we’re all happy. I figure millions of people around the world have been cosleeping for centuries, so there must be some merit to it!

Sometimes it can be hard to break them of the habit. Ben was hard to break and still wants to climb in my bed now that he is 3. The second one I did not co sleep as much and it was easier to break him once he started wanting to sleep with me. However, I feel very close to the son I slept with the most. It creates quite a bond. They won’t want to sleep with you forever and as long as both husband and wife are happy then all is well.

Rach – Yeah, once you start, it’s hard to stop. We’ve made it a rule that they must go to bed in their own bed each night, just so we can still have time to ourselves.

Judith – Agreed! Great advice. We got our king size bed after Julia because we knew it’d get tight once we had more kids.

Alicia – I think if I could redo it, I wouldn’t have been so strict about Julia sleeping with us. But, she makes up for it now! I figure so long as the parents are happy with the arrangements, than it’s totally fine.

Well, I don’t have kids but I remember when Andrea was little she was diagnosed with “baby asthma and some how she would end up sleeping in my parents bed so that they didn’t have 2 constantly get up in the middle of the night. That went on until she was 7 I think, then my parents tried 2 make her stay in her room but every time my dad was on a business trip my mom would let her stay with her. The last house we lived in me n Andrea had 2 share a room and I think it’s only been 8 months since she’s actually stayed in her own bed all nite…. Then again Andrea migt b one of those extreme cases.

It will last forever Sarah! Or at least until they graduate high school! Seriously, Dan is getting very poor sleep right now because of our kids. I sleep okay though. Bribing them with promises of ice cream helped us for a time, but doesn’t seem work anymore!

NOOO!!! Say it ain’t so! We do sleep better without the girls, for sure, but I’ve learned to just sleep around them. If that makes sense. I’m just too weak {as in tired} to deal with it in the middle of the night, so I cave every single time.

We had to put our foot down with Ben and discipline him for disobeying us when he got out of bed. Otherwise, he would be in our bed every night. He use to be fun to sleep with, but now if he climbs in my bed he just keeps me awake most of the night sometimes.

[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Sarah Windham, Sarah Windham. Sarah Windham said: I never thought I'd be a co-sleeping mama: http://bit.ly/eEamB2 #fb […]

This reminds me of the sleep deprived nights of having an infant! There were definitely nights there in the beginning where Squishy would end up with us…I was too exhausted to make decisions!

How does it work in the morning? Do they wake up when you wake up?

The girls have always been early risers, so with a few exceptions, I haven’t had a morning routine that doesn’t involve them waking up within 15-30 minutes of me. Now, when they do get into bed, once the alarm goes off, I can usually trick them into going back to bed and can start my quiet time. Surprisingly, they can sleep through me walking around {if I don’t turn on the lights}. And then there are those mornings that they are up before the alarm. For a while I was trying to wake up super, super early {btwn 4:30-5} to get a real head start. But I kid you not, within a couple of days Julia started waking up that early too {and this is when she was in a crib not sleeping with us}.

Don’t children always look so adorable when they are sleeping?

[…] of sleep – My friend Sarah recently posted on how their family has started co-sleeping–something she never really planned on doing. It reminded me of our own bedtime situation […]

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