Archive for July 2009
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“For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.” Ephesians 5:22-28
“I am my lover’s and my lover is mine.” Song of Solomon 6:3
Happy Anniversary, Jonathan!! I love you and am so thankful to walk this life and our faith out together. You are an amazing husband!
Nicknames
Posted on: July 28, 2009
- In: Life
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We’re a family of nicknames. Even as a kid I had a ton of nicknames (Liz, Lizard, Sissy, Bob – don’t ask). Anyways, Jonathan and I found it pretty easy to nickname Julia. Here’s just her short list of nicknames:
Jules
Mabs
Mabeline
Maby-baby
But for whatever reason, nicknaming Hannah has prosed some troubles. The best I’ve come up with is Hannah Bear. Some others are:
Hanners
Hanni
Mitchy
I wanna do more with her middle name (Michelle), but can only think of Shelly/Shell. I did come across Mitzi which I think is kinda cute, but it’s been hard to catch on to, which is a clear sign it’s not the best nickname.
So my blog reading friends, have you got some good nicknames up your sleeve for my little girl?
Intentional parenting
Posted on: July 27, 2009
- In: Life
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Over the last few months, I’ve been really convicted on my parenting. I want my daughters to leave my house prepared to serve, live, love and grow with the Lord. But it can be overwhelming. A lot. I’m required to grapple with their sin nature while dealing with my own. That’s hard work. Yet, stronger and stronger the desire and urgency grows within me to capture their little hearts and lead them the right way.
One of my biggest fears in life is failure. Next to that is failure as a parent. Now, this may sound arrogant, but I’m not all that afraid of not being a “good” mom. I mean, I want my girls to look back and think I was good, but part of me feels like that will happen regardless (maybe because I’m that way with my mom). However, my fear of failure lies in not being a godly example as a parent. My fear is that Julia and Hannah would walk away from my house and not know, really know, the Lord. That is what scares me.
Jonathan and I have started taking steps to make our parenting more intentional, more focused. There are some major tasks at hand, but along with those are seemingly little things that my heart knows will make a difference. One of those little things is computer time. Since we moved our computer upstairs after the remodel, I found myself getting online a lot. At first it was to just “quick check something”. That morphed into checking something else, then something else and before I knew it, I was ignoring Julia because I was too distracted by the web. I slowly realized that I was showing Julia that my time online was more important than spending time with her, her dad, her sister and even God. So I made a commitment to my family, that in order to be more intentional in my parenting, I would only have a designated time to be online. I committed to only getting on 1) during naps (like right now), 2) when Jonathan is home and we are both looking at something together, and 3) during Julia’s blanket time.
I know it seems small, but for my heart it’s a big deal. It’s choosing to say no to self and yes to God and His calling on my life. And really, it’s quite liberating.
Merry Christmas in July
Posted on: July 24, 2009
- In: Life
- 3 Comments
I love Christmas.
A lot.
Like crazy a lot.
So, we’re celebrating Christmas in July tomorrow. We’re taking the girls swimming, I have a small little present for Mabel (Hannah just got some new clothes today from my aunt that count as her gift) and Jonathan just bought a bike.
I seriously considered putting up the tree. But then realized that I am would shoot myself half way through the project and it just wouldn’t be good. Instead, I’m just sticking to watching some good classic Christmas movies. Mabes and I watched Elf this morning and I plan to watch A Christmas Story during naps tomorrow. It’s just a shame there aren’t any chocolate covered cherries to be consumed.
So….
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!
Truthful Thursday – Proverbs 15
Posted on: July 23, 2009
“A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.” Proverbs 15:1
Truthful Thursday – Psalm 13
Posted on: July 16, 2009
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“O Lord, how long will you forget me? Forever? How long will you look the other way? How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, with sorrow in my heart every day? How long will my enemy have the upper hand? Turn and answer me, O Lord my God! Restore the sparkle to my eyes, or I will die. Don’t let my enemies gloat, saying, “We have defeated him!” Don’t let them rejoice at my downfall. But I trust in your unfailing love. I will rejoice because you have rescued me. I will sing to the Lord because he is good to me.” Psalm 13
This is my favorite Psalm and quite possibly one of my life verses. More times than I can count, God has used these verses to speak to my life. Recently, He used them again. Starting in verse 5, this psalm addresses the idea of choice. David is getting knocked down, beat up and defeated on all sides. God seems to be nowhere in sight. David is hurt and lonely. He cries out, but God doesn’t answer. Yet. Yet, still David chooses to praise God. David chooses to rejoice in his Maker. David chooses to sing to God, because in all things and through all things (whether we believe it or not) God is good.
I want my life to be a life of well made choices. I want my life to be a life that chooses, whether I feel it or not, to praise my Savior. For He is good. All the time. Whether I feel it or not.
Who is God?
Posted on: July 15, 2009
- In: Life
- 3 Comments
Last night, Jonathan and I had a long talk about who I believe is God. Meaning, who is God to me? His character, the way He shows love, etc.
I confess that I have been holding onto some lies about God. My heart and my mind don’t always line up, making it hard to believe what I know to be true. One of the hardest truths for me is that Jesus has paid for my sins. I struggle with feeling like God is going to pay me back for a sin I committed yesterday, a year ago or even ten years ago. I especially feel this way when things are either too hard or too good in my life.
I challenged myself earlier this week to get to the root cause for my thinking this way. One memory stood out clearly in my mind. My miscarriage and the death of Judah. Perhaps it was because these losses were one after the other and seemed sorely unfair, I saw (maybe even till see) them as a punishment for past sins. There were a few more that came to mind, but are a tad too personal for a blog.
Then I delved a little further. I am scared that God will stop loving me. That I will sin bad enough for Him to finally give up. This correlates with being punished for past sins. I sin, years later am punished, then God is satisfied and can keep loving me. Somehow in all this I struggle to prove myself worthy.
Alright, I know, really, I know that this is not true. I know, in my mind, who God is and that this isn’t God. Jesus paid for my sins, Jesus took my punishment, Jesus satisfied God. But my heart doesn’t always align with that thinking. In our talk last night, Jonathan addressed some key issues and I think it helped me get on the right track to seeking out the truth in these areas. I know who God is, now it’s a matter of believing it to be true.
In the car this morning, I heard “You never let go” by Matt Redman. These lyrics rang out to my heart:
Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me
*On a completely random, non-God topic. I was eating a sandwich while writing this and just want to say that the one thing that grosses me out the most in this world is when you go to put mustard or ketchup on a sandwich and the first little bit that comes out is all watery and stuff. Gag me. Seriously. I could handle a massive blowout but not that watery mustard/ketchup nastiness.
Coffee, friend or foe?
Posted on: July 13, 2009
- In: Life
- 4 Comments
Julia woke up this morning at 1:30. Didn’t go back to sleep till after 4. For an hour.
Hannah woke up at 3:30. Didn’t go back to sleep till after 5.
I originally woke up at 2:30 (since Jonathan got up with Julia). Fell back asleep until 3:30.
I have been up ever since.
Around 9:30 this morning I was in desperate need of coffee.
Got said coffee. Took the girls to the park to burn off any remaining energy Julia had.
Came home. Ate lunch.
Put Julia to bed around 11:30.
Put Hannah to bed around 11:45.
Me? Still awake.
Physically tired, but mentally awake.
Can’t sleep.
Wish I could.
Stupid coffee.
Coffee, my love.
I’m still trying to figure out if I love coffee or hate it.
Since the girls went to bed, I’ve cleaned the upstairs, started three loads of laundry, paid random bills, had a quite time, cleaned my bedroom and surfed the web.
Without coffee, I could be asleep right now.
Without coffee, I would not have made it through my morning.
With coffee, I got a lot of stuff done.
With coffee, I am wired.
Friend or foe?
My life in numbers
Posted on: July 11, 2009
In sequence –
1 – the number of Pepsis I’ve had so far today.
2 – the number of miles I walked with Jack this morning.
3 – the number of hours I slept in a row last night.
4 – the number of years Jonathan and I will have been married this month.
5 – the number of pounds I’ve lost this week! 🙂
In random order –
166 – the number of days til Christmas.
8 – the number of weeks until the “4th trimester” is over.
27 – the number of pounds I’ve lost since having Hannah.
19 – the number of days til our anniversary.
21 – the number of days til the apple orchard opens.
And my favorite set of numbers to report:
3.5 – the number of weeks and days it took to fit into pre-Hannah pants!
That’s right. Today I officially fit into my pre-Hannah pants. I started wearing them last week, but had to tie the button with a hair tie to help them fit. But not today! Today they fit.
Next goal is to wear my pre-Julia jeans. They still have to be tied, but hopefully not for much longer! 🙂
Failure
Posted on: July 9, 2009
- In: Life
- 6 Comments
I’m failing.
I have always set high standards for myself. I expect a lot and want to be the best at everything. But, I will say that I am successfully getting my butt kicked by having two children. So much so, that my mom is coming back to Iowa for a few days.
Failure.
In the last four weeks, Julia has watched a shameful amount of tv.
Failure.
My disciplining is sporadic at best.
Failure.
Hannah has slept in our bed far more than Julia ever did. And I don’t see it stopping right away.
Failure.
My house looks like a tornado came through it. All day. Every day.
Failure.
I have not been the most grace giving, love showing mama.
Failure.
But God’s grace is sufficient for me, for His power is made perfect in my weakness.
Success.
God’s grace has saved me.
Success.
God still loves me. Even though my house is a mess, my oldest has watched too much tv, my youngest relies on a pacifier, my stress level is high, my emotions are on the fritz and even as an adult, I am having to call my mom to come rescue me.
Success.
“To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:7-10
A Wife Loved Like The Church 
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